However you want to say it, the end of a relationship can be hard. I’m struggling with how I should feel as I end a relationship that has brought me a great deal of joy, but has devolved into stress.
A year ago, I met a new friend. He’s someone I had watched from afar for a long time, someone that I had tried to meet before, but the timing never seemed to work. Finally, on November 2nd, 2012, I mustered up all my courage and introduced myself to…
The Marginal Writer…
Our friendship grew quickly. He was eager to share his thoughts, words tumbling effortlessly onto paper, expressing his emotions freely. He made me laugh with his humor…sometimes he was deeply thought provoking, other times he just made me smile. A couple of times, he even brought a tear to my eye. But he was never shy about sharing what was in his heart. The early months of our friendship were rich and rewarding.
But a few months into our relationship, I started to notice that something was wrong. He didn’t seem as open as he had once been. He stopped coming around as often. And when he did, he had trouble sharing like he had before. I tried to figure out what had changed, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. He was…different.
I wondered if I had done something wrong. Was I becoming boring? Had I said or done the wrong thing? Was there someone else? I couldn’t figure it out. And as time went on, he became even more distant.
I started becoming stressed. I felt pressure to continue the relationship…to make it work. I started forcing myself to be who I thought he wanted me to be. And yet, as time went by, it became clear that my relationship with The Marginal Writer was over. So today I am breaking up with The Marginal Writer.
I’m not bitter…I’m actually relieved. When a relationship ends, the closure and the finality is painful, but it allows for a new start. And I am moving on. I know that I will write again in the future. But I will no longer impose a deadline that increases my stress level as I have done for the past year. I’m excited about some of the new opportunities that have presented themselves…I’m busy. I’m content.